Q: If a magician's wand is used for cunning stunts, then what is a police officer's baton used for?
A: [use your powers of deduction on this one]
Q: What happens to a lawyer who jumps out of an airplane at 35,000ft without a parachute?
A: Who cares!
Q: How many racists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None - because racists hate being enlightened.