Have you ever just stood still for a moment and wondered whether you were happy, whether you were doing the things in life that you wanted and hoped to do, whether you were still heading towards that all elusive dream destination? As I get older I find myself stopping more often and thinking have I made it, am I close, how much further before it all falls into place? As a famous former Liberal Prime Minister of Australia once said, 'life wasn't meant to be easy' (or at least something like that) sometimes I wonder if it was always supposed to be so bloody hard into the bargain.
It is time to wake up and smell the coffee...It is time to do more things for myself, the things I want to do and not all the other things that other people expect of me. My biggest weaknesses as a human being is an inability to say 'no'. It doesn't matter big project or small, I always want to help out in anyway that I can. I am spread too thin (not of body mind you) and being the perfectionist that I am, the self-analysis of the quality of my commitments always sees me short of where I think I should be.
I guess this really hits home where letters after your name mean so much more than experience. To be here, to be there, to do this, or to do that you must have a Masters, you must have a Doctorate, and myriad of other humbug and bunk! Being young and stupid and intent on bucking the trend has seen many of my younger contemporaries who jumped on the Masters and Doctorate bandwagon slowly but surely edging in front of me in the employment stakes...sometimes you just have to swallow your pride and conform so LLM here I come.
And for a topic, beats the hell outta me...I am good at a few things such as criminal and international law (there's a combination for ya) and advocacy. It is just about time I returned to my country of origin and got back the things I want to do and the things that I am good at. Yet, I am good at what I do now although I never seem to get the recognition that I think I deserve (perhaps others do not think I deserve it). Recognition is not money but an acknowledgement of skills, ability, and experience.
They say (I do not know who 'they' are but I have been told so) that a change is as good as a holiday, maybe I just need a holiday - a month of meditation in the mountains of Bhutan, the Land of the Thunder Dragon, sounds like it would do the trick! By the way the photo is not mine but can be found here and yes the photo was taken in Bhutan. If you are a traveller then this is a site worth checking out!
2 comments:
Hi there :)
Bumped into your blog and I enjoyed reading your stuff. As for this question of yours:
Have you ever just stood still for a moment and wondered whether you were happy, whether you were doing the things in life that you wanted and hoped to do, whether you were still heading towards that all elusive dream destination?
My answer would be...
I HAVE! Like so many times especially on birthdays. :D
Great blog you have here. Will be stopping by more often. Cheers!
I may be wrong, but in my observation some lack of recognition you may be feeling has nothing to do with not deserving it. In our somewhat relatively narrow-minded society it is rather hard to get acknowledgment for hard-earned skills and achievements (as opposed to cosmetic wealth, fame, status, or letters behind your name from Ivy Leagues). In addition, being a bule (albeit an Indonesian at heart as you are ;) )sort of puts you in a societal box where, you'll be forever regarded as a "foreign consultant" or someone who "damn well should have the skills that you have, coming from a 1st world". Something like that. I'd say striving for recognition is a tricky ambition. Striving for wealth is a lot easier to measure ;)
But striving for where you REALLY want to be by the time you are 40, 50, 60 ... would probably be more fulfilling.
Good luck and DO hold a crazy party for us with free flow drinks if you ever leave this country.
And btw, thanks for the comments. I really needed a slap in the head.
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